Gray Divorce

What is gray divorce?

A gray divorce happens between older married couples. These couples are typically over the age of 55, many of whom are baby boomers and have been married for more than 10 years. These divorces can be more complex than divorces for younger couples who may have fewer assets merged or may have less complex estates.

These divorces often come around as a result of changing perspectives or even simply growing apart. For some couples, empty nest syndrome leads them to reevaluate their relationship and make the choice to separate. For others, the gray divorce phenomenon offers an easier way to leave marriages that no longer offer the emotional support or type of family life they want.

FAQ

Why do people get gray divorces?

The reasons for gray divorces can vary from couple to couple. However, there are a few common reasons why older couples may choose to end their marriages. This includes the following:

• Simply growing apart after being married for decades
• Cultural shifts in the acceptance of divorce
• A desire to live life on their own terms
• Getting out of a bad marriage or an unhappy marriage

Many of these factors are similar to the ones that cause a younger couple's divorce. It’s largely about doing what feels right for the individual initiating the divorce.

What are the financial effects of a gray divorce?

Gray divorces can be more complex because couples have had more time to combine assets and liabilities. This can include assets and liabilities that impact the couple’s financial security, such as:

• Retirement accounts
• Homes and real estate
• Investment funds
• Living trusts
• Businesses
• Credit card debt
• Personal loans
• Medical bills

These assets and debts must be divided between the spouses, and determining a fair distribution can be difficult. Additionally, some individuals may have to pay alimony to their spouse once the divorce is finalized. This payment helps the receiving spouse maintain their standard of living and get on their feet independently, but can take a financial toll on the spouse making the payments.

Who initiates a gray divorce?

Gray divorces can be initiated by either spouse or by both, and the divorce can either be contested or uncontested. It depends on the relationship, the spouse’s readiness to pursue divorce, and other factors. However, gray divorces are more commonly initiated by women, and the divorce rate among older couples is increasing.

Who does better in a gray divorce?

It depends on the situation and the divorce (also known by its legal term, dissolution) settlement. If a spouse has significant health problems or can’t maintain the standard of living they’ve grown used to on their own, the other spouse may have to pay alimony to help cover those expenses. Each spouse’s divorce attorney can help argue for a larger settlement.

For late-in-life divorces where couples are still friends, they may reach their own settlement agreement with help from their divorce attorneys. However, if both spouses can’t reach an agreement on their own, the court will determine a fair settlement for each spouse.