Domestic partnership vs. marriage: What is the difference?

You're in a serious relationship and are wondering how to move forward. You have two choices: Become domestic partners or get married.  A domestic partnership is another way to formalize your relationship, and depending on your location, it can offer you all the same benefits, rights, legal protections, and recognition as a marriage. 

Let’s look at the benefits, drawbacks, financial implications, and legal rights of each type of union so you can confidently choose the right path for your relationship.  

What is a domestic partnership? How do they work?

A domestic partnership is a legally recognized, committed relationship that is an alternative to marriage. It grants both same-sex and opposite-sex couples specific benefits, legal rights, economic protections, and estate planning benefits granted to married couples. 

Here’s a quick history lesson. Domestic partnerships became popular in the 1980s as a way for same-sex couples to form a legal union because gay marriage wasn't accepted then. However, their need and popularity have significantly declined since the Supreme Court’s landmark decision in the Obergefell v. Hodges (2015) case, which gave same-sex couples the constitutional right to get married. 

Now, even though marriage equality is federal law, some states continue to accept domestic partnerships as a valid relationship status. And many straight and gay couples prefer to use domestic partnerships to define their bond. 

Rights of domestic partners

Depending on where you live, a domestic partnership can provide the following benefits:

• Hospital visitation rights 
• Shared health insurance
• Access to health information
• Inheritance rights
• Tax benefits
• Death benefit 
• Family and medical leave
• Estate administration rights 
• Ability to make medical decisions 

Rights of marriage

A marriage offers many benefits and rights, such as receiving government benefits, access to employer benefits like health insurance and family and bereavement leave, death benefits from life insurance policies, and estate planning rights.

Key differences between domestic partnership and marriage

Under U.S. family law, there are important differences between domestic partnerships and marriage, with the most significant ones being: 

Federal recognition: By law, the federal government doesn’t recognize domestic partnerships. Marriages, on the other hand, are legally recognized at the federal level and by all states. They do, however, offer the same benefits and protection for same-sex marriage. States like New Jersey and the District of Columbia legally accept domestic partnerships at the state level. In contrast, states like Texas and New Mexico don’t accept domestic partners at the state level but have specific cities and counties that do. 

Greater range of benefits: Marriage provides more protections and benefits to a partner than a domestic partnership. This is particularly true when it comes to federal benefits such as Social Security or sponsoring a non-citizen partner for immigration. For example, if your partner is not a U.S. citizen and you are thinking of sponsoring them for immigration purposes so they can live in the United States long-term, you won’t be able to do that as a domestic partner. But, as a spouse, you would have this right.

Tax break: A married couple can file a joint tax return, which can bring certain tax advantages. Domestic partners must file tax returns separately in Arizona, Idaho, Louisiana, Texas, and Washington. Also, a marriage allows a partner to inherit the other’s assets through a will and not be taxed. A domestic partner can be subjected to inheritance and other federal taxes.

Formalization of union: A marriage entails securing a marriage license and undergoing a formal religious or civil ceremony. Formalizing a domestic partnership requires registering with the appropriate government agency and paying a fee.

Pros and cons of marriage

Let's unpack the advantages and disadvantages of getting married. 

Pros 

• Wider legal recognition: Marriages are recognized at the federal level and across all 50 states. 
• Access to federal benefits: Marriages give access to federal programs like Social Security benefits and Medicare, along with immigration sponsorship rights. 
• Tax advantages: Married couples can file joint income taxes, which can lower the couple’s overall tax liability. 
• Automatic healthcare rights: Spouses automatically get visitation rights and access to healthcare information of their partner. A married partner has the ability to make critical medical choices on their spouse’s behalf without having to show their marriage certificate as proof.

Cons

• More formalities: Getting married requires a couple to undergo more formalities and legal procedures like securing a marriage license and performing a religious or civil ceremony. 
• Difficult to dissolve: Ending a marriage can be a messy and drawn-out process, especially if one partner decides to take the other to trial. Dissolving a domestic partnership is usually less complicated.

Pros and cons of domestic partnership

Let’s quickly run down the pros and cons of being domestic partners.

Pros 

• Alternative to marriage: Domestic partnerships are a great way for unmarried couples to share a life with someone they love and enjoy all the same rights and benefits afforded to a married couple without officially putting a ring on it. 
• Fewer formalities: The process to form and dissolve a domestic partnership involves less formalities and paperwork than a marriage. 
• Avoid marriage tax penalty: In a marriage, joint filing of taxes can push high-earning partners into a higher tax bracket. Domestic partners escape this tax penalty because they aren’t recognized as married for federal tax purposes. 

Cons

• Limited benefits: Domestic partnership benefits vary significantly by location and offer limited financial scope and protection. For instance, under California law, a gay couple must register with the state to access domestic partner benefits and provide proof of commitment. 
• Less legal recognition: This form of union is only recognized by a few states and localities. Domestic partners can’t legally claim to be “family.” 
• Required proof: In some cases, domestic partners must show evidence of their relationship through a domestic partnership agreement or a shared bank account. In contrast, a married person just needs to show their marriage certificate. 
• Difficulty in passing on assets: Married couples automatically inherit some portion of their spouse’s estate and assets. Domestic partners need to specifically list their partner as a beneficiary on their last will and estate planning documents. 

Requirements of a domestic partnership

To qualify as domestic partners, both partners must meet the listed criteria: 

• Be of the required age as stipulated by their state
• Be unmarried and not in another domestic partnership with anyone else
• Must live together in a state where the domestic partnership is legal
• Share a committed, financially interdependent, and romantic relationship
• Not be related by blood

Again, the eligibility requirements for domestic partnerships vary drastically from state to state. For example, to register as heterosexual domestic partners in New Jersey and Washington, one or both parties must be at least 62 years old. In other states, like the District of Columbia and California, same-sex and heterosexual couples over the age of 18 can file for domestic partnerships.

Inquire with your Secretary of State or local county office for the most recent information. Additionally, consider working with an experienced in-state lawyer who can explain your state's domestic partnership laws.
 

Forming a domestic partnership

This exact procedure depends on where you live, but it generally requires registering your partnership with the state or local government agency. Check with your local county office for eligibility, application, and fee requirements. You may need to provide proof of identification, financial dependence, and residency alongside your domestic partnership application.

Dissolving a domestic partnership

The process for ending domestic partnerships varies by state. In a state like New York, both parties must file a Termination Application with the local clerk's office. Other jurisdictions might require you to undergo a divorce or annulment process to legally dissolve the relationship. 
If you live in a state or city that requires ending the partnership through a divorce process, the courts will divide your assets and determine whether one partner must pay child support or alimony to the other.  

Domestic partnership agreements, like prenuptial agreements, make settling finances, community property, debt, and other legal matters easier in case of termination. LegalZoom can help you file for a domestic partnership and draft a domestic partnership agreement that protects your rights and strengthens your relationship. 

Is domestic partnership a good idea?

Whether you should choose domestic partnership over marriage comes down to personal preference and what you are seeking out of your relationship. If you foresee a future with children, owning multiple properties, and other long-term commitments, speak with a lawyer to understand whether local laws and a domestic partnership will support those goals. 

FAQs: Domestic partnership vs. marriage

What is the downside of domestic partnership?

The biggest drawback of domestic partnership is the limited recognition it has across the U.S. As a result of this domestic partners are not able to gain the same level of protection and benefits afforded to married couples. Limited recognition is also the key difference between domestic partnerships and marriage. 

Is a domestic partner the same as a spouse?

This depends on where you live. In the eyes of The Fed, a domestic partner is not the same as a spouse for legal or tax purposes. However, if you’re living and registered in a state like California, the state will treat your domestic partner as a spouse and offer them equal protection and rights. 

Civil unions vs. domestic partnerships?

A civil union, or a civil partnership, is a state-recognized alternative to marriage for unmarried couples. In some states, the terms civil unions and domestic partnerships are interchangeable, while in others, there are vast differences. Consult a family law attorney to understand your state’s standing on the two. 

Is a girlfriend a domestic partner?

Your girlfriend may qualify as your domestic partner if she meets the criteria set by your state or city. A domestic partner shares a long-term committed relationship, lives in the same house, and is financially interdependent.

Is a domestic partnership legal in every state?

As of 2024, the U.S. Supreme Court does not recognize domestic partnerships in the same way that many states do. While this may change in the future, it's important to research the laws of your home state to check whether you and your partner can claim benefits.